i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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