thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
We had to coat check the pizza.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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