Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.