Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Can i not drive my cunt home
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS