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• (224): View more from Illinois

  She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on

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• (407): View more from Florida

  We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.

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• (310): View more from California

  Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters

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• (979): View more from Texas

  It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (407): View more from Florida

  i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka

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• (714): View more from California

  Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up

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• (415): View more from California

  I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well

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