Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.

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(404): View more from Georgia

So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.

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(305): View more from Florida

She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.

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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.

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17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Read it at the TFLN blog
(516): View more from New York

i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".

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(847): View more from Illinois

he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?

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(343): View more from Ontario

His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted

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(248): View more from Michigan

Why am I feeling up grandma?!

(312): View more from Illinois

I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?

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