New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
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He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
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Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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