I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
pop tarts are not kleenex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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