So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
