I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
