You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
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just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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