Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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