2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize