She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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