Your mouth is God's brothel.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
