she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
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Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
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All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I need water and some morals
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
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