i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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