was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Pooping to opera.
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