Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
