I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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