p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i barfeds in our rink
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
