Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize