i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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