is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
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