Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions http://tfl.nu/cic0
  Replies (100) Good night (7315) Bad night (1257)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?

  (1-440): View more from Ohio

  because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it? (1-440): because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even? http://tfl.nu/6ni1
  Replies (20) Good night (5406) Bad night (588)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji http://tfl.nu/f9w1
  Replies (9) Good night (1286) Bad night (2291)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall http://tfl.nu/esl2
  Replies (4) Good night (2423) Bad night (598)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?

  (1-323): View more from California

  We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?

  (323): View more from California

  Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender? (1-323): We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out? (323): Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture. http://tfl.nu/sr23
  Replies (44) Good night (1497) Bad night (28445)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (334): She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard. http://tfl.nu/xu4e
  Replies (9) Good night (4303) Bad night (1319)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE http://tfl.nu/54pd
  Replies (23) Good night (2081) Bad night (5930)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey. http://tfl.nu/pfjh
  Replies (19) Good night (6766) Bad night (1124)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.

  (1-352): View more from Florida

  What?

  (352): View more from Florida

  Just dont open the beer drawer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge. (1-352): What? (352): Just dont open the beer drawer. http://tfl.nu/02la
  Replies (16) Good night (1725) Bad night (5822)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school... http://tfl.nu/h356
  Replies (13) Good night (1235) Bad night (2467)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl? http://tfl.nu/31z4
  Replies (5) Good night (2031) Bad night (948)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy http://tfl.nu/t11r
  Replies (13) Good night (2547) Bad night (584)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible http://tfl.nu/ks54
  Replies (3) Good night (445) Bad night (268)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat?? http://tfl.nu/1o4f
  Replies (9) Good night (1292) Bad night (366)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  When your hungover saltines taste like hope...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): When your hungover saltines taste like hope... http://tfl.nu/bvv1
  Replies (1) Good night (317) Bad night (270)

Randomize