god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
