Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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