And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
