I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
