i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
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You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
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Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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