i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
