i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
i think my cat just said my name.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
