Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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