Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
NoShamevember. You game?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
