"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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