Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
