Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.

(1-859): View more from Kentucky

Well... I doubt that.

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(256): View more from Alabama

He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.

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(757): View more from Virginia

yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.

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The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
Read it at the TFLN blog
(205): View more from Alabama

remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.

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(775): View more from Nevada

He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there

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(913): View more from Kansas

I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.

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