Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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