Umm I'm too high to move.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
