party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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