she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
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I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
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We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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