Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Randomize
