Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
