jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
