Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize