I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
