Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Everclear isn't food dammit
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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