the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
