Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
grandma shit on top of the toilet
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize