She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
