Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
handjob tips. give me some.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
