oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
