oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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