yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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