Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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