I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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