Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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